I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
now i know why i became what i already was.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
My penis needs a shock collar
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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