we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
