Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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