If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Randomize
