its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting.
Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
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