her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Randomize
