maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
