Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
