Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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