Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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