We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
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