Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Randomize