Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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