I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
