I hate all girls vehemently.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
