How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
be right there i have to get my cape
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
