just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
We're too hungover to prance.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
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