I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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