Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize