Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
