Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
