ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I just blew my weed a kiss
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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