Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize