Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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