Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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