Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize
