Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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