How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
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