found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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