If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Randomize
