is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
