come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
