I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
