so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Randomize
