i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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