So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
