So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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