Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(650): View more from California

i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf

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(703): View more from Virginia

it wasn't lemon gatorade

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(216): View more from Ohio

my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?

(1-216): View more from Ohio

i'd get off the bar first.

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(805): View more from California

"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend

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(416): View more from Toronto

She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.

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(469): View more from Texas

you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator

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(605): View more from South Dakota

If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.

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