I heard we made out
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
