operation harelip BJ is a go
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
