D3 body, D1 cock
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
