Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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