we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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