Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
this will be a night to untag.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
