He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Randomize
