he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
