doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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