i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
did i just pee glitter
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize
