note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
