Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
