How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Randomize
